Harry Potter Rant
by Omniwriter1234
Summary: This is basically a rant I wrote up in a few hours, read at your own risk and expect more to come.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I do not own or claim to own Harry Potter in any way shape or form and do not make or attempt to make a profit in any way shape or form from this work of fiction.

AN: This is just a rant on Harry Potter, read at your own risk and expect more to come.

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Harry Potter, a terrific book series about good over coming evil despite the odds. At least that what we all thought the first time we read it. I personally have read every Harry Potter book, including the Beetle and the Bard short story book, and as I look back on the series after several years I've realized something, something that should have been obvious.

Harry Potter is horrible.

Now this may anger many people but I have good reasons and since this is basically a rant and I'm pretty sure I said this in the description so if you're here don't expect many positive things about it but do respond if you find evidence against this.

First point is Severus Snape, a man I feel true hatred for when I look back at his actions. For some reason Rowling wanted us to pity Snape and tried to explain his actions with his feelings of regret at what he caused by giving Voldermort the half of the prophecy he heard but one thing comes to mind when I think of his pleading to Voldermort before the Potter's were murdered. Spare Lily but kill her son and husband, not caring for either James or the infant Harry so I find his claim of wanting to protect Harry near the end of the Deathly Hallows hard to believe. Sure, he might have grown to hold the same love for Harry like he did for Lily but there was never actually any character development to me for him from Rowling throughout the seven books. Sure he may have been behind the scenes doing things that the reader will never know but from this viewpoint I see him as someone who never grew up. Bringing up the Prisoner of Azkaban now it shows he held onto a grudge against Sirius Black and was willing to send him back to Azkaban when he could prove his innocence, ignoring it and allowing the bullying he suffered at the hands of James and Sirius to make him want Sirius to suffer a fate called worse than death. Severus could have easily been better than Sirius, who is shown to keep to his bullying ways in the Order of the Phoenix almost as he refers to Severus as Snivellius, I don't know if I got the spelling right so sorry in advance, but Snape could have easily and I mean easily let his grudge go or at least put aside his feelings for Black for the sake of winning the war. Now I'm not blaming him for holding the grudge after Sirius went back to bullying him but wanting to condemn him to the Dementor's Kiss was just wrong. Well that's all I can think of right now so I'm moving on, if you disagree leave a review.

Next one is Lord Voldermort and his entire crusade to put Purebloods on the top of the world. A plan that makes absolutely no since. I don't even think its very clear what he wanted to do but I'm going to infer that he wanted Purebloods to rule the entire world...or something like that. Now let's infer, I know I'm doing this a lot but bear with me, that he actually managed to conquer the Wizarding World and moved onto the Muggle. Now this is where he will definitely fail at because of one simple fact:

Bullets are faster than spells.

Now you may be thinking, wizards have shield spells or can cast silently. My retort: bullets are still faster than whatever wizards can do. And this is just going with the weaponry of that time, nothing like the advanced in weaponry of today. So in the end even if Voldermort conquered the Wizarding World I highly doubt that he would understand enough of the Muggle World to actually take it over and if he began to attack then he would be massacred along with every Wizard, Witch, and Magical Creature in the world as paranoia and fear spreads through the Muggle World, something that will happen if they are attacked and in the end there will only be a genocide of everything magical in the end.

Next I bring up Harry Potter, the main and title character who in my eyes should be dead. In the end as I look back I find that he's an idiot who I wonder how he knows to hold his own spoon because of his actions in the book. First point, he goes after the Sorcerers/Philosopher Stone, admittedly after telling a professor who didn't believe him, but could have also just not gone as Voldermort would have never acquired the Stone without Harry arriving and the Mirror of Erised giving him the Stone. Not to mention he helped Hagrid, someone I find borderline crazy and should be kept far away from children, smuggle a dragon, A DRAGON, out of Hogwarts because the foolish half-giant decided he could raise a massive dragon in secret, somehow he thought that was even possible, and so when his foolishness comes back to bite him he brings in three First Years to take care of the problem instead of doing it himself and fa…you know what, at this point I could go on forever about Hagrid and how much I hate everything about him but this is about Harry so back on topic. Ignoring his escapades during First and Second Year I question his decisions during Third Year. Quidditch had proven to be immensely dangerous to him at this point, nearly being killed while playing a game both previous years, yet he continued to play it and act as the Seeker while employing completely ridiculous and downright deadly stunts at points to catch the Golden Snitch when it was called for. Any sane athlete would leave a sport that consistently endangered their life or at least look for ways to protect themselves from harm while playing but Harry only gets an even faster broom after falling off of his during a Dementor attack during the game by the end of the year. To anyone else a third time of almost dying would knock some sense into them and tell them it was time to quit the sport and move on but not Harry. Harry continued to play the sport even then and reached Captain, admirable if the sport wasn't so deadly to him most of the time and if his recent publicity from being the "Chosen One" which would have influenced anyone in Dumbledore's position to name him Captain eventually. I can list more but Quidditch was something that just irked me by Third Year since it nearly killed him in all three years he had been at Hogwarts by that time so I'm moving onto Fourth Year where he was once again a moron, trying to outfly a dragon in the First Task instead of using anything else like blinding the dragon with a flash of light or just summoning the egg to him if it came to it, I mean there were hundreds of possible strategies that played to his strengths but he chose to try and outfly a fire-breathing dragon because he was told to. By the Second Task he proves Snape's reasons for disliking him as he steals from the professor because he couldn't think of anything to do, something he also did in his Second Year with the polyjuice potion ingredients, and overall that entire year just managed to show how stupid he really was. After dealing with how fickle the people at Hogwarts and the Wizarding World in general could be nothing should have really bothered him and I can see why most Fanfictions I come across have a divergent at Fourth Year when the school turns against him.

Using his point to turn over to Hogwarts itself I find it a disaster that continues to happen every year. First is the house systems, putting eleven year olds into one of four houses for the next seven years is almost painful to think about because it would make more sense to either resort them all every year to allow people to interact more and try to unite the different houses as friends were moved between them or simply not have them at all but it's not either so it's a moot point to bring up as the houses were very clearly divided even amongst each other. The House Cup just increased this divide between Houses as each began fighting the others to make sure they won and points became a major thing at Hogwarts. Bringing this up I find no sense in even having the points as there's no clear scale on how they are given or taken as Dumbledore almost regularly gave Gryffindor hundreds of points because of the Golden Trio's actions at the end of the year when other Houses would work hard to win it fairly only for it to be ripped out from under them by Harry Potter and his friends yet again. It's not even explained how someone gains power to take or give points as in Fifth Year Draco Malfoy could take points away anytime he wanted once he joined the Inquisitor Squad set up by then Defense Against the Dark Arts Professor Delores Umbridge. Also Severus Snape always takes points from Gryffindor for minor and mostly ridiculous things while giving points to Slytherin for ridiculous reasons as well but in my eyes this is understandably as the entire school seemed to view them as evil and his favoritism could be understood to give other students and professors a warning to not try anything against them. Still, in my eyes at least, it remains a completely pointless thing that only causes greater and greater problems.

Next I move towards Reberus Hagrid, a character I hate with such a deep passion that I can hardly put into words as I find the half giant a crazed maniac in the making with very little education and someone is asking for children to die if they place him within a hundred meters of them. Now you may ask yourself why I have this hatred and it is simple, Hagrid has caused more problems than he is worth throughout the books. One, during his few years at Hogwarts he kept a Acromantula and later released it, allowing it to enter the Forbidden Forest and spread into a massive colony that would later attack Hogwarts during the Battle of Hogwarts after his death and Hagrid showed actual shock for some reason when they tried to kill him when he attempted to visit, a completely ridiculous notion as those spiders would of course only see him as food, any animal would once the leader was dead and order was lost for a time. Now instead of reporting this all to the Headmaster and having it dealt with Hagrid didn't and if the spiders would have attacked or started taking students no one would know until he spoke up, something the idiot wouldn't do or if he did he would say they wouldn't hurt anyone. The man's blindness when it comes to dangerous creatures and items makes him a far worse threat than Voldermort in my eyes as his ineptitude as a teacher could easily result, and did result, in students getting injured and eventually dying. Sure Malfoy could have approached Buckbeak better but this is still Hagrid's fault, he was the teacher in that situation and it would have made much more sense to start off the lesson with something easier and less dangerous like any types of worm or just a lesson on safe and dangerous plants in the Wizarding World, but of course he doesn't do this and should have been fired like Malfoy said. This isn't to mention the fact that he constantly had illegal creatures during Harry's time at Hogwarts.

At this point I could keep going and going on this topic and basically make it a ten thousand word long rant but I figure I could separate this into chapters in the future and expand into my issues with fanfiction and the Harry Potter universe in general so I'll leave it off here but expect more to come.

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AN: Well, how was it? Leave your opinions in reviews or a topic I should do next.


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: I do not claim to own or own any recognizable and licensed material appearing in this work of fiction in any way, shape, or form and I am not attempting to or making a profit from this work of fiction in any way, shape of form. All recognizable and licensed material belongs to their owners in every way, shape, or form in accordance to the law. This piece of fiction was written only for entertainment purposes.

Okay, rather long disclaimer out of the way, enjoy several rants and onshots all put together for your reading pleasure.

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**Rant number one...Those Wizards.**

Wizards. Ohhh Wizards, how I hate them so. Their utter cowardice and generally sheep behavior has caused the birth of this next rant. Do enjoy as I completely destroy the Harry Potter world.

In short, a single man started two wars that he was very easily the victor in if not for the intervention of a child, the same child mind you, during both wars to end them. Now, do you see what's wrong with this picture or do I have to explain it?

Well, I'll explain it anyway.

The Wizarding World does not deserve to exist if this is the case. This isn't like the normal world where terrorists attacks are horrifying and impossible to fully predict everyone of them and immensely disturbing even to think about. Wizards actually have the capability to travel through time and instead of using it to prevent deaths and attacks, they give it to a thirteen year old girl so she can take extra classes. Completely ridiculous. This isn't even to go into the more obvious things like all of them having a certified weapon in their back pocket. These people are not normal, with a flick of their wrist they can do almost anything. These people have no reason to lose any battle and panic at the sigh of a bunch of terrorists. They do not have to right to do anything but stand a fight as all of them, and I mean all of them have a weapon on them at all times. Perhaps this is the problem actually? Perhaps there reliance on magic has destroyed the one thing that all people should have.

A drive to live. A drive to succeed despite the odds. It's hard to have something like this, any drive at all really, when you have magic to do everything for you. Lacking this drive makes Wizards pathetic in the end despite their abilities. This drive is what brings forth great achievements and terrible horrors from people, the natural human instinct to fight, to learn, to succeed in life, to be remembered by people and not forgotten.

Sadly, Wizards lack all of this.

Some may say I'm looking too deep into this (I am to answer that question) but this has seriously irked me as I think back on the seven Harry Potter books that I read with so much excitement. Looking back at the series, phenomenal as it is, I can't help but point at the flaws that plague it. The entire Ministry collapsed in a matter of days and Voldermort began his ruthless persecution of Muggle borns with not a single inch of protest from the public. They all just sat back and watched as the world became darker and darker. One again, this isn't the normal world, a world where people are bound by the terrible fear of those in power as power is taken from them, this is a world where everyone has extraordinary abilities that others can only dream of. This is a world where the impossible is possible and done everyday by the common Wizard and Witch. In the end, a dictator ship is impossible to create with people of such power making up the entire population. Of course, this would be the case if any of them had an ounce of will in them.

Wizards, as I stated before, have no drive to them and thus have no fight, no will, no desire in them. In short, they lose what makes them human, they become something weak. In the end, this great power destroys them and the saddest thing is that they don't even know it. Wizards are simply sheep when the day's over, herded by the shepherds and slaughtered by the wolves, powerless to stop either from doing what they wish to them.

Truly, this is a horrifying thing to think about and even more horrifying to actually live. Well it would be if they were aware of it but, as said before, they are nothing but sheep.

**Alright, that got way to depressing so here's a oneshot to make this an actual story!**

"HARRRRRYYYYY POTTTTEEEERRRRR!" with a roar like a mad man, or the ever famous Leeroy Jenkins, one Harry James Potter kicked down the doors to the ancient manor and charged in like a madman, wand in hand and spells blazing forward in an unmatched frenzy of destruction, chaos...was that a rubber chicken?

"Oh Merlin, he just ran in." one Remus Lupin whispered in shocked silence.

"Shite! Stick to the plan people! Stick to the plan!" Albus Dumbledore rushed after the crazed Harry who was juiced up on close to eighty cans of Red Bull.

"SIRRRIIIUUUSSS BLACKKKKKKKK!" Sirius Black followed his godson and the leader of the Order of the Phoenix into the manor with a similar shout, barking with laughter the entire way as spells lit up the room at the end of the ridiculously long hallway.

"Stop doing that people, stick to gr…"

"RONNNNN WEASLEEEYYYY!" Ron interrupted Remus with a shout and laughter as he charged after his best friend." Let's do this!"

"Merlin's Bloody Balls people, stop doing that!" Remus shouted as he rushed in after his errant students, friend, and mentor.

"So, do the rest of us charge in too?" one Nym...(Finish that name and I blow your bits to kingdom come)…I mean Tonks, just Tonks, asked to the group of Wizards outside the base of Voldermort's operation.

"Everybody just run I guess." Remus spoke in a resigned tone, dragging a hand down his face with a sigh." I just really don't care right now."

'I'm too old for this shite.'

"ORDER OF THE PHOENIXXXXX!"

"BLOODY HELL! Why!?"

Remus looked down towards the charging Wizards and sighed before resigning himself to his fate as he took off down the halls.

"REMUS LUPINNNNN!"

**Short oneshot, second one coming up…**

One Harry Potter looked down the decimated courtyard to the sneering pale face of Voldermort and then behind him to the ground of Wizards and Witches that had pushed him out to fight.

"Well Tom, I think we both know how this ends." Harry reached behind him, fingers wrapping around the end of his recently repaired wand." Just you and me, in this messed up courtyards, at Hogwarts, at….Got the time by chance?"

"Five fifty two in the afternoon." Voldermort tossed aside his robes to reveal a pair of Muggle jeans on underneath along with a simple t shirt." Would have been better at high noon."

"Damn right. On three." Harry's words were met with a nod and the two enemies readied themselves.

"One…" Voldermort's hands tightened around his wand, red eyes locked with Harry's own.

"Two…" emerald green eyes stared unblinking as Harry's entire body tensed.

"THREE!"

Both drew their wands and an explosion of bright light erupted from each wandtip, sealing the two from view in a flash of light.

"SHOOT!"

A giant rock slammed into the ground from Voldermort as a paper stood ramrod straight in front of Harry.

Voldermort's eyes widened in shock as the paper fell, moving in slow motion to the Dark Lord as he found this battle and war lost. It was with a thundering boom that the paper crashed into the ground, covering the rock with itself as Harry stood in triumph before the Dark Lord, shocked at his defeat. Voldermort fell to his knees, the shock too much for him as he threw his head back in a howl of grief.

"NNNNNNOOOOOOOO!" Voldermort howled (kind of Darth Vader like).

"YES! YES! YES!" Harry shouted in victory while jumping around the courtyard with his arms raised in the air (very Daniel Bryan like if the authors says so himself).

And thus, the Battle of Hogwarts, which really cost no casualties as literally no one hit anybody, the state of the courtyard was simply due to terrible maintenance as the House Elves were fired by the Purebloods in charge of the school….okay off topic, back on topic now….And thus, the Battle of Hogwarts was ended, ending the terrible Second Wizarding World with no other repercussions or even punishments to what amounted to Wizards Nazis.

**FINAL RANT!**

Another rant here for Harry Potter, one that will most likely infuriate most people who read this but I'll say this. I am only expressing my opinion and you are free to do the same on this site. Now on with the rant.

A popular storyline in Harry Potter fanfiction, at least to my knowledge, is Harry being wrongfully convicted of some type of crime and thrown into Azkaban where he then gains a large amount of power and proceeds to own Voldermort. I don't know where this idea came from, admittedly this is a wonderful idea as it could have easily happened in canon, but it has been used much too often. These type of stories fill the Harry Potter fanfiction archive and it begins to limit the flow of new stories. The primary focus of this site, at least to me, is to try out new ideas and it has worked spectacularly.

Now, I am not insulting this storyline at all, it is a wonderful take on what could have happened if Dumbledore hadn't arrived in time or if the Ministry truly was desperate to silence Harry during his Fifth Year. The idea is very entertaining and an interesting plot to build a story on. Now, with all this in mind, please stop writing them in such a copy paste format. I mean all of them, at least the ones I've read, have to do with Fifth Year or the ending of the Wizarding War. Shake it up a bit, don't just have Cedric's death pinned on Harry or use his trial Fifth Year. The Ministry is clearly hopelessly corrupt if what basically amounted to Nazis could escape with no punishment. This is a perfect opportunity to explore how hard it is to change and actually include people like Hermoine or Ron into the setting, keep the Golden Trio together.

Of course, you could take this an entirely different way and have Harry responsible for wrongful imprisonment and having to deal with the guilt over destroying someone's life. To even make it better and even deeper, have it his former enemies that trick him, showing him that despite everything he does, they still have power in the Wizarding World and far more than his own.

This and much more can give a new twist to a very good storyline that I personally enjoy but can't write for well. So, if you agree with me, spread the word and introduce new and interesting twists and tweaks to this storyline. At the moment, it is growing more and more numerous but with little changes to the plot to suit each great author on this site.

So, this wraps up the last piece of this rant/story/whatever else. Some of it was dark and serious and the rest was light and humorous. All in all, some of it is good and some of it is most likely bad to you. It all is up to your opinion on the matter. One I hope you express to me in the reviews.

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AN: Hoped you enjoyed it all, if you didn't agree or just feel like I messed something, tell me in the reviews.


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